Thirteen years later, Scary Movie is back, and the Wayans brothers haven’t lost their touch.
Bill SkarsgÄrd seems contractually obligated to spend part of every movie trapped in a room, and somehow I never get tired of watching it.
Two hours of action, adventure, and further proof that Grogu could commit minor crimes and we’d all immediately forgive him.
A movie that somehow turned weather forecasting into one of the most suspenseful jobs imaginable.
Fluorescent lighting, empty hallways, and confusion- now turn those into one of the most memorable horror experiences of the year.
Finally, a movie that proves suburban parents will apparently do literally anything before filling out another student loan application.
What it feels like when someone turns capitalism, fashion, and a fever dream into a very expensive art project.
A movie that somehow makes the 2009 housing market collapse feel both horrifying and weirdly hilarious.
A movie that made sitting in a theater feel halfway between watching a biopic and attending a Michael Jackson concert.
A movie so loud it occasionally felt like the jump scares were targeting my eardrums personally.